Saturday, August 29, 2009

Day 7/294 of My Health Journey

Well, today was the official first weigh-in day. I was a little scared when I had to step on the Wii. Yes, that's how I weigh myself. I figured its a pain to set up each time so I won't be stepping on it everyday. I had a problem with that when I had a bathroom scale. I was stepping on it all the time and was at the point of being obsessed. One day, Ron told me I should just smash it or get rid of it because I never liked what it said.

Well, that's exactly what I wound up doing with it one day. I took it out into the backyard, set it on the sidewalk, got a sledge hammer out of the garage, and beat the hell out of it. HAH! It had no control over me any longer. It felt so good! And of course, my neighbors probably thought I was nuts!

This was probably a year ago and I haven't really weighed myself regularly since then. Which brings me back to stepping on the Wii balance board this morning to get a current weight....

I am happy to report I weighed in at 2.4 pounds less than last week. WOO-HOO! I now weigh 198.0. Good-bye 200's. I will never see you again. It wasn't a perfect week, but I felt like I did a good job overall and that's what it's all about. I was able to fit in two days of exercise and I followed my diet closely. We even went out to eat twice and I tried to make good choices at the restaurants.

I also want to talk about the wedding shower I went to today. My cousin Justin is marrying Julie in October and the shower was today. I was able to make good food choices, had a great time with family, and even got some shopping done at the farmer's market on the way (can you say fresh locally grown produce?). What a great afternoon!

Well, I'll be back tomorrow with more thoughts. Keep reading...

Until then, Pam

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Day 5/294 of My Health Journey

I'll get my complaining out of the way right off the bat and clear my head. This has been one of the worst weeks I have ever had a work. I can't believe it is only Thursday. One more day to go and I am looking forward to the weekend (which I may have to work if anyone calls in).....SIGH....

Okay, now I feel better....on to the good stuff.

So I spent some time tonight at Michael's with my daughter Brooke shopping for an art box. I started looking around at all the fun stuff they have to do in there and thought to myself, "Why don't I start a project? That will keep my hands busy when I want to reach for food." I checked out all the different yarns they had in stock and decided to buy a really soft skein that has different shades of blues and grays. Very pretty. I am going to start on a scarf for my co-worker Linda. I am thinking it will be her Christmas present so I will have some time to get it done. She has taught me a lot about the job since I started working with her in January. I'm thinking a homemade gift will be much better than a gift card or something.

So I'm thinking this project will kill two birds with one stone....one Xmas gift down and something to keep my hands out of my mouth for the next few months.

When I was looking at all the things to do at Micheal's I started thinking, " When did I give up on being creative? Maybe I should channel some of the activities I used to do when I was younger. All the stuff I really enjoyed like art classes at the Art Museum, dance lessons, playing an instrument. I mean I spent years playing in band and I think I would have a hard time reading music at this point. I used to love taking pictures and working with photography stuff. Where did all that go?

I was talking to Ron (my husband) last night. He made a comment about how I don't have many friends. At first I was pissed. But after thinking about it, he wasn't too far off the mark. I have been putting everyone else in front of myself my whole life. I have always done for others and I guess that doesn't leave much time for myself. Not much time to nurture friendships, not much time to enjoy the things I like to do, or used to like to do as the case may be. I know it's a good thing to have a servants heart, but I am figuring out I need to balance it with things I am doing for myself. If I am depleted of energy, if I don't recharge myself, if I don't keep my cup full, how can I possibly fill someone else's cup? I have nothing of myself left to give....right?

So we started talking about signing up for a dance class....I don't know if this is actually going to happen, but I'm at least thinking of getting out there and doing something for me. It's the first tiny step in this long journey.....

Until next time, Pam

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Day 3/294 of My Health Journey

So today was a new day at work and it went much better than yesterday. I was able to leave by 3:30 pm and I thought... "What a great day to take Keenan for a haircut before school starts on Thursday. I think I'll get one too." What a mistake...We both left not liking our haircuts. I wanted mine shorter for an upcoming trip and shorter is what I got. YIKES! This one will take a long time to grow out. On the plus side I probably lost 1-1/2 pounds of hair weight...lol.

I was able to get in exercise today. I needed to drop off a prescription at Rite-Aid so I walked instead of driving. I'm guessing it was 2 miles or so. I will probably measure it in my car the next time I have to drive that way. I figured it was exercise with a purpose (not like all the health benefits aren't the real purpose...lol).

Well, not much to post today. Four more days until my Saturday weigh-in. I'm actually looking forward to it.

Sweet Dreams....Pam

Monday, August 24, 2009

Day 2/294 in My Health Journey

Okay, let me start by saying that today was one of the worst work days I've had in my professional career as a nurse. My job today did not involve nursing care, it involved detective work, counseling, disciplinaries, and more, and finally ended after a miserable 11 hours. Thank God for the other supervisor I work with...we were in it together today. What's the saying?..... Misery loves company?

Here is the highlight of my day...my one shining star. I was able to stay on track eating. I wrote down all my food, I didn't drink any pop. There was no stress eating happening! Even with the bag of miniature candy bars that the other supervisor decided we needed to share....I resisted!

I don't think I am going to get my walk in tonight, but I did walk for 30 minutes after I posted last night. I will fit in three nights of exercise this week! I have to, because.......(drum roll please)......

My sister has asked me to run in a 5K with her at the end of October. What a great motivator and a way to get my butt moving! I ran/walked a 5K last November and was proud of myself for doing that. I am going to look up my time for that race and see if I can beat it by at least a minute! I ran that one in memory of my grandma, Marie LaCourse, who we lost to cancer the year before. I wish she were here to follow me on this journey. I know she is looking down at me and smiling right now from heaven. Love you Grandma!

Well, I'm going to close it out tonight with one of my favorite quotes. I have this posted at work and it seems fitting on this journey....... Nothing is particularly hard if you break it down into smaller steps. -Henry Ford

Until tomorrow......Pam

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Day 1 /294 of My Health Journey

Hello All,

I am a 40 year old woman who has decide to take charge of my life, my unhealthy eating habits, and my lazy ways. My husband and I are planning a vacation next summer and I would like to be in the best shape of my life for the event.

I have been heavy my entire adult life and I am a little scared to "peel back the layers" and discover the person that lies beneath. Will I have more confidence? Will I be more outspoken? Will I still struggle and feel bad every time I eat something I know isn't good for me? Will I stop feeling like the fat girl in the room, even when I'm not always the heaviest? Will my husband desire me more? Will I love myself more? Will I be a happier person?....

Let me give you some cold hard facts. I currently weigh 200 pounds (as of yesterday), I am 5'5", and I am clinically obese. I have a compressed disc in my lower back that discourages me from exercising. That's always my excuse anyways. I am also on Zestril, a anti-hypertension medication, due to my high blood pressure. These are statistics that I will be changing.

My goal weight is to be 150 pounds (and have a healthy BMI) by the time we leave for our trip. We are leaving in approximately 294 days. That's 42 weeks and 50 pounds to go. I figure I have a healthy goal of losing 1 to 1-1/2 pounds per week by the deadline. How do I plan on doing this, you ask? Let me tell you my game plan....

First, accountability. I am putting this out there for anyone that would like to follow my journey and watch me succeed. I am becoming accountable to all of you.

Second, Lifestyle changes. I am going to make small changes each week hoping they add up for a huge impact. I am already on the right track in that I don't smoke or drink alcohol, but there are other things I do that hamper my weight loss efforts. (More on that later...)

Third, exercise. No more excuses. Do I think my body will be better off just sitting around watching movies or actually getting up and engaging in some sort of activity? No brainer, right?

And lastly, inspiration. My mom lost tons of weight a few years back and has kept it off. My sister just lost 40-50 pounds over the last year or so for her wedding earlier this month. These people have the same genes I do. If they can do it, I can too! I am using my sister as my inspiration. She has a full-time job, has three boys (and a new husband) to take care of, commutes 30 minutes to work and back everyday, drives her boys to their sporting events, and still finds time to work on herself. She has made herself a priority. Let me tell you this...she looked BEAUTIFUL on her wedding day! She was GORGEOUS in her wedding gown! When I saw the pictures I saw a happy, confident woman. She looks at peace with her life....

I also saw myself in the pictures. I was the matron-of-honor...the only attendant standing up for her.....and I looked huge. What a shock! I thought the dress was pretty (and it was) but I wasn't happy with the person that was looking back at me in those pictures. I literally cried when I saw them. Big tears running down my big cheeks at how large I looked! I couldn't believe that I looked like that. I vowed right there to my husband that I was going to make a change. Lots of changes.....and this brings me to today.

Okay, the changes for the first week will be this....

#1....No pop at all. I am cutting it out of my diet. I am giving up diet pop also. I just don't care for the taste of it, so why bother?

#2...Exercise at least three times this week. I am going to write this into my day planner so I can schedule it the same way I would a meeting at work.

#3....Keep a food journal. I will right down everything that enters my body starting tomorrow morning. I've done this one before and it is really helpful to keep track of my calories.

#4....I will commit to weighing myself every Saturday morning and posting the results.

Well, I think that's enough for today....I will try to post regularly to keep myself accountable. Thanks for sharing in this journey with me....

-Pamela